Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does change the future
To be able to forgive others, you have to be able to forgive yourself.
Self-forgiveness requires self-understanding, compassion. And therefore it is a challenging task to do. If you are struggling to make peace with yourself and move forward, this article may help you to find a solution.
Admit you made a mistake and then learn the lesson.
When you make a mistake, admit that you messed up. Deal with it and learn the lesson from it. Denial is the shortcut to get us into deeper trouble. It is important to take full responsibility for whatever happens. We do not play the blame game here.
Do not forget the past, learn from it. Learn from your own mistakes. Try to have a self-conversation to identify the reason why you make such a mistake. Eg. you let your emotions control you, you make a rash decision… And make sure that you put those lessons into practice.
You can not change yesterday, you can change tomorrow.
It is important to embrace every part of yourself. Your strengths, your talents, and even your flaws. You are the one who knows yourself the most. You know that you are not perfect, you allow yourself to make mistakes. You just do not allow yourself to ignore that, you do not allow yourself to make the same mistake over and over again.
Why should you carry this awful feeling with you all the time? Once you have learned the lesson, let it go and look at the positive side of it — think of each mistake as an amazing learning experience. With these lessons, you will be able to be a better human being.
Be kind to yourself.
When you know that you have tried your best, you have done what you could. Be kind to yourself. Make sure you take a good care of yourself. Make for yourself good food, get enough sleep. Respect yourself. Even though you messed up, it does not mean that you can look down on yourself. Know your values, trust yourself.
Being kind to yourself also means that you have to stop comparing yourself to others. Your yesterday is different from my yesterday, therefore your today is different from my today. We just can't simply compare. The moment you stop comparing yourself to others is the moment you form your own opinions, you create your own inner world, you make your own decisions.
To err is human. We make mistakes, and therefore we need forgiveness. Remember that you always have a friend — yourself. And as a friend, we forgive each other.
